


Aversion to Food

by TimeTravelingPirate



Category: Star Trek AOS, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Eating Disorders, M/M, McCoy and Spock are too sweet to Jim, Multi, Slavery, Smut, Threesome, Unhappy fic with a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-12-01 06:23:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11480520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TimeTravelingPirate/pseuds/TimeTravelingPirate
Summary: When Jim willingly places himself in danger, ending into a scenario that was similar to Tarsus IV, the recovery process is a lot different this time around. This time, he has Spock and Bones by his side.





	Aversion to Food

**Author's Note:**

> A/N Hey guys! Finally posted another fic.
> 
> So this one is slightly different then what I normally do. Mainly because it focuses on a triple paring than a couple. Hope that works out. I also think I suck at writing smut so??? I hope you enjoy it anyway.
> 
> Also, I did slight research on the results of starvation and malnutrition will do to the human body. I am in no way an expert nor claim to be, but I tried to sum it up as best I could.
> 
> FINALLY! I would like to thank the lovely Noey for beta-ing my fic for me. I appreciate her help greatly and couldn't have done with without her.

Jim knew the potential happenings of the mission he found himself going into. He had braced himself, prepared himself as much as he could. The conditions were going to be rough. After all, he was putting himself into an Orion slave camp. Shit wasn’t going to be pretty. However, he had not anticipated being one of the select few to be ridden hard, expected to complete monumental tasks with little to no aid. He wasn’t sure if this was a sick attempt to break them for something bigger and better _ , _ but Jim had endured it. He’d had practice before. Though, this time, he was able to save himself from that mindset. headspace. He encouraged others, gave them his food, made sure that they were better off before he attended to his own needs. It was inevitable that this mission was going to kill him. No sense in delaying the fact. He was beaten, malnourished, suffering from sickness _ , _ and all he could think about was making sure the other slaves survived and his mission was complete. The Enterprise would come eventually. He just didn’t know when. That was the hope that kept him going _ : _ the survival of others.

 

*

 

Tension radiated off Spock. Anyone who was near him could feel it. Hands clenched tightly behind the small of his back - enough for the skin to go impossibly white as he stood at attention. Hues danced back and forth across the massive screen. The small blip that was the Captain’s signal was varying in rapid sequences. Spock was worried. Through unseen events, the Orions had taken the Captain to a separate location from the man slave camp. Spock hoped it had been to a better facility, as better for slaves as it could get, but it had been the opposite. The Enterprise Crew had lost his signal for two weeks before they were able to locate him again. The crew only hoped that the Captain had been able to get the information that would officially shut down one of the largest slave rings in the galaxy.

“Sir. We need to get him. Now.” Sulu said, voice strained as he brought the ship into orbit around the planet.

“Understood. Lieutenant Uhura, please open ship wide communications.”

“Yes, sir,” Nyota replied.

“This is acting Captain Spock. We have relocated the Captain and are in orbit around the planet. In 30 minutes time, I need an away team to assemble so that we may retrieve Captain Kirk. Medical is requested to attend to the planet as well. Spock out.”

Uhura flipped off the comm and looked at Spock with a worried expression. He met her eyes and gave the woman a curt nod. Jim’s absence had been noticed. God only knew what sort of condition they would find him in.

 

*

 

McCoy wanted to vomit the moment they beamed down to the planet. The air stank of decaying and unbathed bodies, feces and everything else that came with it. These people were not treated like people at all. They were treated to something less than slaves _,_ if that was even possible. If the scent was anything to go off of, Bones was becoming increasingly worried as to how they’d find Jim.

The closer they got to the Captain's locator chip, the more anxiety-ridden Bones became. They had to be stealthy so as not to alert the guards to their intrusion. With each passing second and the wary gazes of the slaves that looked at them, McCoy regretted everything about this mission. He was all for human rights _ , _ but the fact that he had eventually allowed Jim to go on such a mission..., he was sick with himself. This sickness only became magnified when they found a small heap of which could only be described as the sleeping quarters. The other slaves looked up and shifted to the side. There was hardly enough room for Bones to kneel down comfortably as he brought out a tricorder to gauge the damage done.

“Jim.” He hissed, quietly. A hand gripped at the form’s shoulder and was withdrawn in surprise. All he felt was bone. “Fuck.” He whispered as he eventually rolled the man over. The sight that greeted him was nearly enough to make him feel faint.

“Oh my God,” McCoy said again. To his left, he felt Spock stiffen and become petrified with stillness by what they could see in the dim light.

“Doctor McCoy, what is the Captain's condition?”

“He’s holding on by a thread, Spock. We have to get him out of here now. Just by looking at him he is severely malnourished, sick _ , _ dying. We need to move. Now.”

In one swift movement, Bones watched as Spock replaced his phaser in the holder and scooped up Jim. It was done with such little effort, one could only wonder what Spock was thinking as he picked up nothing but a pile of bones. Jim was too thin. Impossibly thin. The fact he managed to hold on was astounding.

 

*

 

Noises and sounds broke through to his consciousness. He could tell that Bones and someone else were talking in hushed whispers. Jim wasn’t sure exactly what about _. Instead, _ he lets his mind wander. They found him. They actually found him and he was alive. He couldn’t really believe it. Unless this was a dream. It very well could be. Near the end, Jim was having trouble distinguishing between reality and fantasy. But then something struck him. They were talking about him.

“Spock. I’m telling you. I’ve seen this before. Back in the Academy. We were going over the effects of malnutrition on other planets. Jim’s scans look remarkably like the one we studied in class. Granted, we studied one that belonged to a kid. But still.”

“What are you trying to stay, Doctor?”

“I don’t know _ , _ dammit. But I have a bad feeling about this. Jim get’s dodgy about his past. Sure he’s told me about his step-father and the abuse he had to deal with, but there is a span of about 5 or so years that he doesn’t talk about. But I’d bet you those scans I saw in class are Jim’s.”

“You are inferring that Jim has had experience with malnutrition before and thus so, willingly put himself in harm's way again?”

“I guess. I don’t know. I’m floundering here. But I’m damn sure those scans are the same.”

“Do you wish to ask the Captain about this?”

“Not now. Maybe when we get him better. He’s got a long road of recovery ahead.”

“Indeed.”

Jim felt his heart sink in his chest. His records we supposed to be sealed or classified. No one was supposed to know about  _ that _ . But maybe Starfleet had given him some animosity about the whole thing. It simply could have been a fabricated chart or an anonymous one. However, he knew Bones, and probably Spock, were going to grill him about it later. Great.

Their conversation quieted and Jim felt the presence of another. He wasn’t sure who it was but suddenly a hand was gripping at his wrist. Cool fingers gripped around the bone and squeezed lightly.  _ Spock _ .  God only knows what he and the others thought since their Captain has been gone. Jim wanted to draw himself to a more conscious state but he was too exhausted. He needed sleep. He welcomed it.

 

**

 

Weeks passed and Jim never left Sickbay. He didn’t have the strength or energy. Even Bones was slightly alarmed at his lack of fighting on the matter. He’d tried to bring up the conversation with Jim several times but he’d shut that down. Instead, he’d ask about the investigation, wondering if he’d gathered enough evidence to finally shut it down. Spock answered those questions by saying that an official investigation had been opened. It was a start.

It was one morning before shift that Spock came to visit him. A smile stretched across sunken features. Instead of conveying warmth, it was like watching death smile in the face of the living.

“Jim.” Spock murmured softly. “How are you today?”

“I feel good.” He did, actually. He still wasn’t eating solid foods yet, even though he’d been rescued weeks ago. His stomach couldn’t handle it. He was used to this. In time, maybe it would get back to normal. But already, in his mind, Jim knew that he and food were going to have a love-hate relationship.

“You are certain? Are you hungry?”

“No. This seems to help. Can’t eat real food but hey.” He shrugged, light-hearted about the whole thing before showing Spock the needle that was in his arm.

“You are not concerned?”

“That I can’t eat food yet? No. Not really. It will come eventually.”

The fact of the matter was, it took Jim a long time to adjust to food when he had been a victim of Tarsus IV. He’d spent months with Medical, trying to coax him to eat solid food. At first, it had been a physical thing. They tried to give him solid food before he was ready. Later, it became a mental thing. He didn’t deserve to eat. Not after the sins he had committed on the planet to survive. The doctors were baffled. They did attempt to put him with a shrink _ , _ but that had fallen through. However, Jim was always good at putting on a show. So he did. He pretended to eat and they released him back into the world. Of course, it had all been a lie. The Captain now had a feeling this would be the same case. He was just going to have to figure out how to hide it better since both Bones and Spock would be on his ass.

Spock pressed his lips together, the only sign of acknowledgment. Jim knew that this was going to be a touchy subject. But he was prepared to face that. If he could keep his past his past and move forward, then all would be right with the world.

“Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?”

“No, Captain. I simply stopped by to check on  your well-being.” The Vulcan paused as if thinking of what to say next. “You presence has been notably missed. Myself along with the others of the crew are glad that you are back.”

Of course, the blonde couldn’t keep the wide smile that crossed his features. “I knew you guys liked me _ , _ ” he laughed, slipping into that old skin of a carefree Captain who used humor as a way to combat personal turmoil. He wondered if anyone else had picked up on that fact. Jim assumed he would have to wait and see.

 

*

 

No matter how hard he tried, McCoy was never able to get a straight answer out of Jim. The kid had been in sickbay for three weeks now, needles and fluids going into his body and yet, he remained tight-lipped about the whole affair. Bones knew something was up, he just didn’t want to push him. Not yet. When Jim was finally out of sickbay and performing light duties, then, then maybe Bones would consider grilling his friend. He’d need Spock’s help as well. But until then, McCoy spent his free time pouring over those scans and the classes he had back at the academy.

Late one night, glass in hand, he sipped burning liquid as orbs danced from Jim’s scan to the one that had been in the academy, school notes sitting on his PADD as he racked his brains as to everything he had learned.

_ Malnutrition is one of the worst ways to die. It is a slow and painful death. The victims often falling into depression, despair, and hostility. People who suffer from extreme hunger will do anything for just a small scrap of food. They may kill, maim, eat another human or one of their species, dumpster diving, eat rodents, bugs, or trash. Anything. Not only does this have a physical effect but a physiological and psychological effect too. _

_ As you can see from this scan, a young human boy suffered from malnutrition. We don’t know much about the conditions of where these were taken and where he was that would allow him to be in such state. _

_ Here, his muscles and tissue mass have reduced drastically. His skin is the only barrier between his bones and the outside world. Posture is slightly disfigured and warped. You can see the result of several broken bones and hairline fractures. His bones became brittle. Just a simple fall could be horrible. Lungs are shriveled and with slight tears. People who suffer from malnutrition have a slower immune system which makes getting hurt or sick that much worse. They have difficulty staying warm and can die of hypothermia if the conditions are right. _

Bones drew back from his class notes and sucked in a breath. Jim had suffered the same effects when he’d been in the slave camp. He’d been beaten, starved, forced to perform hard labored tasks and God knows what else. 

Now, since McCoy had been Jim’s doctor from the day they both entered the academy, he had an up-close and personal view of all things Jim Kirk. He wasn’t oblivious to all of the healing fractures that happened way before the body scans from class. It took a lot of coaxing, but Jim had finally admitted to being abused by his stepfather as well as the blonde doing ‘crazy shit’, as he put it. Bones believed him. However, there were underlying scars and wounds that could not be contributed to being abused. And now as he sat and observed the two scans side by side, he knew for a fact that they were one in the same. Jim’s scan had been the one in class.

The point of that lecture had only been to show the signs of lack of nutrition, not the whole case study. Bones sort of wished he had been privy to that information but that would be breaching patient confidentiality. Did Jim even know his scans were being used? McCoy found all of this very troubling. He was going to make a point to talk more about it with both Spock and Jim. The only thing was, how had Jim’s recovery been the first time around? It would give him better insight on how to treat his friend this time around.

 

*

 

Spock was meditating when the chime for his door rang. Eyes slowly opened as he gracefully pushed off the ground and strode to the door. He knew who was on the other side.

“Doctor.” He greeted as he allowed the other to step inside.

“You can call me Bones or Leonard if you want. We’re off the clock.” He shrugged, taking a seat in the living area.

“Leonard, may I ask as to why you are calling at this hour?”

“Here.”

Spock moved to take the PADD, eyes quickly looking over the data he was seeing.

“You hypothesis that Jim has suffered this effect before appears to be true.”

“Yup.”

The Vulcan was silent as he calculated and processed the information.

“And what do you wish to accomplish by knowing this information?”

“I want to know what the hell Jim is hiding. We’re two of his best friends. The fact that he willingly put himself through this situation again, is beyond me.”

“Perhaps he wished to prevent the same things from happening to other people.”

“Maybe.”

“And he knew that if his past was divulged we would not allow him on such a mission.”

“Okay. Fair point.”

“So, again doctor. What do you wish to gain?”

“A better way to help Jim.”

“You wish for him to share the experience of his past so that we can better treat him.”

“Yeah. But knowing Jim, he isn’t going to let us help. So, I guess I’m asking for your help on this. Both of us. We need to keep a careful eye on him, noting if he has PTSD or doesn’t eat like he should. Anything.”

“Understood.” Spock hesitated for just a moment. “You’re worried?”

“Yeah. Jim Kirk can be a complex person but he is also very simple. No one has figured out what drives that kid but we can only guess as to what has happened in his life. If it’s anything compared to the shit he goes through now as Captain, I can only imagine what his past was like.”

The silence stretched between the two as Spock observed the doctor. His statement was valid. He often struggled to understand the logic behind many of the Captain’s choices. He knew that humans were not driven by logic _ ; _ yet, Jim’s choices managed to work out in the end. The ‘gut feeling’ he often talks about. Spock thought he would relish a chance to fully understand how Jim Kirk worked.

“Maybe the Captain will be more willing to impart the information to me,” Spock suggested.

An annoyed expression followed by something akin to hopefulness crossed Bones’ features.

“Yeah. That could work.” He nodded before rising from his chair. “Thanks, Spock.”

The Vulcan nodded as he watched the doctor leave. Would Jim be willing to trust him with information that he hadn’t even told Doctor McCoy?

 

*

 

A month. A whole month Jim had been in sickbay. If he hadn’t been the Captain, Jim would have been dropped off at the nearest starbase so he could recuperate. But both Spock and Bones had protested quite loudly. He wasn’t sure if it was because they wanted to keep an eye on him or if it was for other reasons.

Eating was still a challenge. He managed to keep soup down. That was good. But the mere thought of consuming food like chicken or rice or vegetables was nauseating. Often when he entertained the idea, Jim would gag. Of course, this only happened when he was on his own. He didn’t want Bones or Spock knowing. But he knew that the other shoe was going to drop and they were going to question him as to  _ why  _ he had so willingly thrown himself into danger and  _ why  _ he was not concerned with regaining the ability to eat. He shuttered. Those were memories he didn’t want to dig up again, but he knew it was going to happen. He’d kept the truth hidden long enough.

Jim lounged in his quarters, PADDs circling around him as he did paperwork. Bones still wouldn’t allow him to be on full duty till he gained weight back and didn’t look so...scary. His appearance was ragged. Eyes were still sunken, bones poking out here and there, but he was looking better. Energy levels were up, muscle and body mass were up. It was progress. Still, Jim couldn’t stomach food.

A knock at his door drew the Captain from thoughts as he rose, stretched, and padded over to open it. He wasn’t surprised when it was Spock. He smiled brightly at the Vulcan.

“Spock. Come in.” Jim moved to the side and peered with curiosity at the tray he was carrying. “What have you got there?”

“It is a traditional Vulcan dish. I thought you may enjoy it. My mother often made it for me.”

Jim sat down, honored Spock would share a part of his history with him. So, to show respect, he was willing to set aside his aversion to food. However, when the lid was removed, the blonde found that it was soup. He was pleasantly surprised.

“You were expecting something else?” Spock asked, noting the expression.

“Yeah. Well, I wasn't sure what it was going to be.” Jim paused for a beat. “It’s very orange. Carrots?” He asked.

“It is called plomeek soup.”

“Oh.”

Without preamble, Jim brought the spoon to his lips, blowing on the liquid before swallowing. There didn’t seem to be a taste to it. At least, not at first bite. It wasn’t till he had a few more spoonfuls that he noted a certain earthy quality. It wasn’t horrible but it wasn’t the best either. Jim also tried to ignore the fact that it did, indeed, taste like earth, reminding him of scraps he’d eat as a child. There was a lurch in his stomach.

_ Way to go Jim. Thinking about the things you were not supposed to. _

“Is everything well, Jim?”

“Hm? Yeah. Why?”

“You look...pale.”

“I’m fine.” Jim gave a wan smile, trying to squash those feelings. Spock had made him dinner. His body needed to behave.

“Jim,” Spock warned. 

Damn Vulcan.

“I’m fine. Nothing’s wrong.” Just to prove his point, Jim took another spoonful of soup and forced it down. He smiled afterward. Spock still gave him a skeptical look but spoke no further on the matter.

Once they had finished their meal, their conversation led them to the sitting area. Jim could feel the pressing question in the air. Spock was going to ask. He knew it. He was just curious as to why Bones wasn’t  there as well. Jim took a seat on the couch.

“You might as well spit it out, Spock. I know you’ve come to ask a question.” There was a grim expression on his features.

Spock hesitated and looked curiously at the Captain. He looked like he wanted to question how Jim could possibly know that but refrained.

“Jim.” He began. “Doctor McCoy made a curious observation from your current body scan to one he had studied in school. This comparison led him to believe that you have, in fact, suffered through horrible conditions that would lead your body to have the same scan. What happened?” 

Spock’s gaze was earnest. Jim sighed and hung his head. He didn’t talk about it for a reason. Not only would he have more nightmares than he cared for, it put him in a really funky headspace.

“Why don’t you bring Bones up here too. I’m assuming he put you up to asking.” He gave a weak smile as he observed Spock’s expression. It was just uncanny how well they all knew each other.

“Very well.”

 

**

 

In a semicircle, Bones, Spock, and Jim looked at one another. The blonde had a hard time keeping his gaze on the others. It was hard, working up the nerve to actually tell them what he was thinking. The words were there but they died on his tongue. He stole a glance up at noticed how they were both waiting on him. He took a breath.

“I didn’t know they used my scans,” he started off with. His eyes remained down on the floor, fingers clutching at each other as they began to shake. “I thought those records were sealed or whatever. The Brass at Starfleet wanted to keep everything hush hush and give the survivors animosity. But I guess the opportunity was too good to pass up as a teaching lesson, even though some blame the Federation for not acting quickly enough.”

His friends looked at him, following but still wondering where this was going.

“I was a shit head little kid always getting in trouble. I was too clever for my own good and my mom didn’t know what to do with me. I guess it was her way of protecting me from Frank and then to keep me out of trouble. What trouble could I cause on another planet?” Jim stopped, letting that sink in for just a moment before he continued.

“I loved it there. It was like the farms in Iowa. The air was clear, fresh, bright. People seemed to be happy. It was such a contrast from the people I interacted with on earth. Maybe things could be better here. It lasted for a year before it all went to shit.”

The man had to stop then, hands shaking more violently as he worked to control his breathing. Jim could feel the memories beg for his attention. They wanted to be released and consume him.

“Jim,” Bones spoke, looking slightly perplexed like he knew where this was going. Maybe the good doctor could guess and he wouldn’t have to continue on with the story.

“You were on Tarsus IV,” Spock broke the silence, saving Jim from saying the name and going into detail.

“Yes,” he whispered, eyes still down as silent tears slipped down his cheeks. “I was there during the famine.” And that was all he was able to divulge at present. Blue orbs squeezed shut to combat the flow of tears and memories. He couldn’t help it as they danced in front of his eyes.

Before he could become too consumed, two hands gripped at his shoulders. To his right, Spock gripped his shoulder in a solid squeeze. The other, the left, McCoy gripped as he crouched in front of the Captain.

“Jim,” he said quietly. “You don’t have to say anymore if you don’t want to.” It was true, the statement.

“Now we know.”

“Now you know,” he echoed, still refusing to look at either man. But that didn’t stop both of them from encasing Jim in a tight embrace. He hadn’t realized how much he was shaking until both Bones and Spock gripped him to prevent him from rattling off the couch.

Tears came freely now. Spock remained silent and stoic. Bones, on the other hand, let his fingers run up and down Jim’s back while he whispered soft noises, comforting Jim. He wasn’t sure how long they sat there but after all his tears had been spilled, the blonde took a shaky breath.

“I did a lot of bad things while I was on Tarsus. Things to survive. I watched people die, I watched the soldiers murder people. I watched children die, I watched people get tortured, I killed people. One out of self-defense and one by accident. Oh God.” Jim choked as a fresh wave of tears consumed him. That memory came forth, unbidden. “Poor Timothy. It was an accident but he wouldn’t stay quiet. The guard would have found us and I - I...” He wasn’t able to finish, but the strong embrace from Bones and Spock renewed and drew Jim in close.

“Jim, you don’t need to talk about it now,” Bones said softly.

“But I do. No one knows. No one.” Jim’s voice was raw. “I ate whatever I could. I tried to eat the dead but I couldn’t stomach it. It was just too repulsive. I couldn’t bring myself to do it. And the _ n _ Kodos caught up to us. He killed some of us right in front of my eyes. He kept me, seeing how much of a fire I still held in me. He tried to break my spirit, manipulate me, brainwash me, what have you _ ; _ but I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. I thought of all the others, the other children and how they needed me. I needed to be strong for them. Kodos killed them though. So it didn’t matter. They all died.”

Shoulders shook with the force of his sobs now. Anger, despair, hunger, grief  _ \-  _ all consumed him. But the weight of Bones and Spock pressed in on him from all sides. He couldn’t escape it and that was a good thing. Maybe. It kept him from fleeing and entering into a self-destructive behavior that could endanger his life.

Supportively his friends stuck with Jim until he’d exhausted himself crying. Physically, mentally and emotionally, he was drained. So he didn’t complain when Bones ushered him to bed, all but carrying him there. Spock lingered in the back and waited for the doctor to finish. Slowly fading away to the world of sleep, Jim grasped for Bones’ hand. “Stay.” He muttered. “Both of you, please.” Jim tugged Bones forward who in turn pulled Spock with him as the both crammed themselves into the double bed in Jim’s quarter. With both of his closest friends surrounding him, Jim fell into a sleep tormented by his past.

Quiet whimpers caused Jim to stir multiple times from sleep. But true to their word, both Bones and Spock stayed with him. They would take turns silencing the blonde male, whispering words, patting his arms and shoulders. They even went as far as to place chaste kisses here and there along Jim’s cheek and jaw. Each point of contact sent him back into that fitful sleep. But somewhere, in the back of his mind, he realized he wasn’t alone. The Captain was safe in the arms of the two people he held most dear to him.

 

**

 

Bleary eyes and aching limbs slowly came to an awareness. Warmth seemed to wash over his entire body. Light pressure was placed all over. It was a moment more before he realized what was going on. Both Spock and Bones were placing light kisses on his exposed limbs. Such tenderness and care was placed with each movement that a small, strangled cry of emotion left his lip.

Spock’s face loomed over him, open.

“Sush. Jim. You are safe. Let us take care of you.”

His words were soft and gentle as a hand came to caress his face. Shuddering breath caused Jim’s chest to rise and fall harshly before his eyes slipped close again.

Cool air ran over his flushed skin. Bones and Spock seemed to have switched places. Slim Vulcan fingers massaged the flesh of his thighs while Bones pressed his hands to Jim’s shoulders and chest. With each push of fingers, a gentle sweeping of lips followed. The adoration and tender care his friends layered his body with was enough to cause a small whimper and a growing erection. Jim wasn’t sure if this is what they had intended _ , _ but that’s what happened.

Sleep pants were released from his body. Spock’s fingers crept closer and closer until they were just barely brushing against heavy balls. Jim’s breath hitched in his chest, causing his legs to fall open. Of course, Bones was there to swallow the noise with a kiss of firm and knowing lips. Jim’s frame relaxed as he surrendered everything. His will, apprehension, fear, self-loathing, anger - whatever he was feeling melted away until he was completely consumed by both McCoy and the Vulcan. It was when this relaxation was noticed that the gears shifted.

“Do you trust us, Jim?” Bones asked, voice soft as if he were talking to a newborn babe.

“Yes.” The blonde breathed.

“Good.”

Spock’s fingers grew damp in his mouth as he teased at Jim’s entrance. McCoy licked his lips before he placed gentle kisses along the Captain’s lean stomach and slowly working his way down till he was at Jim’s shaft.

Breath became quick and labored. All thoughts, all feelings fled his body as he focused on a singular thing; pleasure. Digits dug into the fabric of his sheets. Hips arched upwards as Jim put his weight on his heels. But it was thwarted as a strong hand pushed him back down.

“Please.” He begged, quietly. “Please. I need…” He trailed off, not sure what he needed.

“What do you desire, Jim?” Spock ask.

“Just...need.”

A green tinged finger slipped with ease past the ring of muscles. Air hissed inwards as Jim’s mouth fell open. Wet heat covered the head of his cock and he twitched, unbelieving that this was happening to him.

Spock’s fingers moved with Vulcan accuracy. With one simple digit, he was already deeply embedded in Jim, hitting his bundle of nerves. It wasn’t long before two and then three fingers were pushed all the way in, making Jim feel like he was completely full. Wanton moans and soft cries fell from his lips as intense pleasure wracked through his body.

The wet heat that belonged to Bones’ mouth worked with such skill that the blonde was shocked that he even knew how to give head. But that was the beauty of his friends (his lovers?), they knew Jim. They knew how to care for him. Knew his needs before he did. So, just as before, Jim released all control over his body and surrendered to his Chief Medical Officer and his Vulcan First Officer.

Having set the pace as slow and teasing, Spock began to speed up the rate of motion of his fingers. His eyes were closed, breath panting as he relished the warm tightness that was Jim as well as the exquisite feeling on his sensitive fingers. He himself was sporting an impressive erection but this was not about him. This was about Jim. However, the lust that pooled inside only encouraged him to go faster, spot on his with his movements. Jim’s prostate was hit every time. Once quiet moans were now loud and desperate.

“Yes. Yes. God. Please. More.” Jim fumbled with his words, unable to form complete sentences.

His cock throbbed as McCoy greedily took his entire shaft down. Legs spread wide, hips thrusting upwards, the blonde couldn’t help it as he fucked up into McCoy’s mouth. Jim whimpered, desperate now for that release to come. It had been a long time coming, building slowly and slowly. And then, quite suddenly, he let out a sharp cry as a powerful orgasm overtook his body. Hot streams of semen spurted into McCoy’s mouth , who took it all in stride. Spock continued to thrust his fingers fast and deep until Jim rest bonelessly on the bed. His body was spent, all energy drained but still, neither Bones nor Spock stopped in their ministrations. Their pace had dropped considerably, just simple thrusts here and there until Jim was lulled back to sleep.

 

**

 

When he awoke next, Jim found his body flush with a Vulcan while Bones was setting up a meal. There were three place settings. A feeling of dread consumed him. However, it must have been sensed when Spock’s grip tightened on him and a soft kiss placed on the back of his neck. It was a reassuring gesture and he relaxed.

“Do no fear, Jim. Trust us. We are here for you.” Voice was soft, whispered against his ear.

Shifting, Jim sat up. Images and feelings rushed back to him. He looked over his shoulder. “Was that real? Did that happen?”

“Yes,” Spock replied.

“Why?”

“Because you needed us, Jim. Our love for you goes beyond that of normal bonds. We would do, will do, anything, for you. You just have to let us.”

Spock's words rang like a gong in Jim’s head. All his self-bravado, all the secrets and the anguish he kept bottled inside, his lovers are giving him a way out. He won’t have to carry the burden anymore. It’s a frightening thought, because Jim has always been on his own. Yes, he’d been truthful, shared parts of his past but...This time. Maybe it can be different. Maybe he can stop running from his demons and run to his friends when he needs help. It’s a novel thought. An appealing and intoxicating thought. One that he wants to latch onto and never let go.

Rising, Jim pushed himself off the bed. He noted that his pants had been returned to his body. Heavily, he sat in chair and observed the small portion of food that is no doubt his. Solid food. They want him to try. At first glance, he was repulsed. Stomach churned in a way that would send him running for the bathroom. But the heavy weight of Spock and Bones presence was pressing in on him again. Medically, he’s ready. Mentally, he’s not. But with both of them with him, maybe he can get past this hurdle.

Jim took a tentative bite. He took another and another until all of his food was gone. He sat back, silently, thinking. He didn’t feel sick. Jim actually felt really good. It caused a small smile on his face. Spock and Bones shared a knowing glance. Maybe things could be alright.

And that was how the remainder of Jim’s recovery went. Bones and Spock, either together or individually , would eat with Jim. They made sure he consumed all of his food. When Jim was broken or had a rough night, again, one or both would be with him. Not once did they complain or tell him to get over it. Whatever he needed to heal and move on was given to him. When the nights got real bad, Jim would surrender everything to Bones and Spock. Letting them take care of his body, giving him soft tendrils of pleasure until he was fast asleep in a dreamless world. It soon became their routine. Even when Jim was completely back to 100% health, Spock and McCoy were always by his side. They never wavered, they never spoke ill of the arrangement. In time, Jim began to realize the depths of their devotion and love for him. The feeling was reciprocated and he would go above and beyond to make sure that he, along with them, would always survive, no matter what was thrown their way.

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
